Wednesday, 7 May 2008

Procrastination Is The Enemy Of Progress

Or is it "the thief of time"? Or something like that.

I'm having a devil of a job making any headway with anything and everything in my life at the moment. I've got a "to-do" list as long as a roll of Andrex loo paper, and absolutely nothing, repeat nothing, is getting crossed off it.

First of all, the kitchen. Why-oh-why did you let me even think about getting it refurbed? The whole thing's turning into a complete nightmare. First of all, various men came into the house, stomped through to the kitchen scattering bits of other people's building works hither and thither, looked at my ceiling or cupboards or floor or windows etc., sucked air in through their teeth whilst shaking plaster encrusted heads as if I'd asked them to reproduce the artworks of Leonardo da Vinci by Friday. Replace a kitchen? This year?? And replaster your ceiling??? Sharp intakes of breath all round. They will see what they can do. They will try to get an estimate to me in the post by the weekend at the latest.

And do they? Of course they bloody well don't. Either they don't like the look of my kitchen, or me (fair enough I suppose). Or maybe we just don't look daft enough to pay an obscene amount of money for bugger all. Whatever.

Secondly, holidays. Now I know I'm not exactly Judith Chalmers when it comes to travel, and I have been known to get pre-holiday jitters par excellence from time to time, but I reckon the only way to conquer this syndrome is to continuously expose myself to it, if you'll pardon the expression. But can I get husband to co-operate and actually help choose somewhere to go? No, I can't. He travels all year round and would probably be just as happy sitting in the back garden for a fortnight, but I don't really go anywhere much and want to see more of the world. As I am sure Oscar Wilde would have said if I'd asked him, "I fear doing nothing with my life more than I fear actually living it". There's a big world out there and I haven't seen nearly enough of it.

And then there are the zillions of tiny little things which I should do which I don't ever seem to get round to - filling in forms, checking accounts, getting some exercise, phoning the "dink" man to remove a dent where some swine opened their 4x4 door and dented the little grey sports car (bastard), chasing up the insurance company re the hole in the roof, choosing some tiles, going to bloody work, having a life, etc.,etc. And trying to write something worth reading, that would be good. And so on. Blah, blah, blah.

You know the sort of thing. How do you sort your life out when it seems to be full of clutter and trivia, you can't make any progress and you haven't got any time to do anything? I'm tempted to ignore it all and maybe, like cleaning, it'll become invisible and after a while the crap will just cease to be important.

And what's more, I can't even blog properly at the moment. Feel too distracted. How sad is that?

I really am becoming a moaner. Sorry.

And by the way, I have absolutely no idea how these rating stars got here (please tell me you can see them too). It's a complete mystery to me. Have been trying to remove them but can't, worried in case I get thousands of "hated it" votes.

Bloody hell, another thing to sort out.

Update: They've gone! Was it something I said?


David said...

sad indeed...when you can't blog, it is time to change things up

Jay said...

But you ARE blogging - and most amusingly, too! Plaster encrusted heads - that made me laugh. I've SEEN builders like that! LOL!

Sorry you're having a hard time right now, but I sympathise. I often have those 'can't get anything done' moments. Or months. Something begins with 'm' anyway.

DogLover said...

Great blog as usual!

When faced with an endless list of things that have to be done, the solution is actually to do one of them - and then the next one and the next one and so on.

I am told it works. Personally I just throw away the list.

Pam said...

I loved the blog as usual. Taking too much on is the cross we bear for being fabulous women I'm afraid.
I don't have those star ratings so it must be just you. I'm already paranoid that no one leaves comments, so stars would put me over the edge.

softinthehead said...

Calling the "dink" man is on my list too but he keeps slipping to the bottom!!

CalumCarr said...

F***! I see so much of me in you - if you'll pardon the phrase.

Clutter is my middle name [Calum CLUTTER Carr].

Maggie May said...

If everything gets too much for me....... I just don't bother with any of it!
Lock yourself in somewhere I do what YOU want for a change! Always works!
Your blog seems normally funny to me!


What are you on about ..... rating stars - I see nothing hon. I know I've got a bit of a head knock and the thinking is a little fuzzy but honest I see no stars!!

And can I just say - I soooo know where you coming from on overwhelmed by 'To Do' lists that I just don't seem to, and no idea which way is up just now.

Think it's perhaps the weather??

travelling, but not in love said...

Oh dear, sounds like you really need that holiday!

Screw the kitchen, I'd make holidays your number one priority...get it booked and start looking forward to it.

I've just spent two weeks procrastinating over the same thing and ended up finally booking a holiday this week. End of July, I'll be sitting in the sun (well, the shade) and writing.....

Well that's the plan. We'll see, eh?

Metamorphic Sweet Wood Irene said...

I find myself either asleep or immobilized to undertake any action, because I know I will be sound asleep again shortly. In the Netherlands it is called spring tiredness, but I guess that is not what you are suffering from. You are suffering from long list intimidation and the best thing to do is to burn the list and stomp on its ashes.

Manic Mother Of Five said...

Am so with you here. Just the everyday SLOG can be such a pain in the arse. Still, we are here, we are healthy and we are GORGEOUS! Chin up chick, deal with one thing at a time and I have every faith that you will soon be sorted. As for the holiday, pick somewhere you want to go and bugger the old man - he's had his chance for input. I love unilateral decisions!

MMoF xx

bart said...

hi... just delurking for a moment, i loved this post on something so totally recogniseable and by a strange coincidence i wrote a post on the same subject this morning...

thanks for a totally original insight into the realms of procrastination... keep well...

Sarah said...

I go into a bit of a spin, if I feel i can't control the craplist- that's all the stuff that says it needs doing, yet is never a case of life or death.
I find my head abuzz with craplist items sometimes, and resent the weekend filled by these kind of jobs.
I paint, and aspired to the idea of a team, who would make my food, carry my paints and see to all the stuff that was obviously too mundane for me to deal with-
Then I thought, i wouldn't wish that on anyone!
If it is any consolation, it makes for a very entertaining blog, your procrastination!
Keep it up!

aims said...

I don't see any rating stars either....and don't know what you mean.

Excellent post - cross that off your list.

GoneBackSouth said...

You should make a list that includes everything you've already done that day - that way you'll have the satisfaction of crossing them off and seeing that you get much more done in a day than you realise. Other than that, I can be no help at all, because I am also prone to "too-much-to-do-therefore-do-nothing-useful-at-all" syndrome.

Expatmum said...

I used to be one of those irritating people who taught management and organization stuff to fully grown adults. All I can say is, "Bite size chunks". Take the damn list and break it down into stuff that you can reasonably be expected to accomplish in one day - perhaps one or two, we don't want to stop you blogging. Then you'll have a sense of achievement instead of being paralysed by the rest of the items on the list.
(That falls under the category of "Do as I say and not as I do"!)

Journey of Truth said...

I didn't see the rating stars, but they also mysteriously ended up on my blog (have to check back on mine to see if they're still there; cable went arse up this morning).

As far as getting shite done, well, do we ever around my place? None, so far as I can tell.

Have a martini. Open the holiday planner and plan it anyway. I would love to have something like that to look forward to.

Barb McMahon said...

I've had the rating stars appear on my blogs, too. But only sporadically....

Blogger's making "improvements" again?

Don't worry about the moaning. Or the procrastination. Kitchen rehabs will put anyone over the edge...

Swearing Mother said...

Hi David, think I might be getting over it. List is now so long, I am starting a list of lists. Eek.

Jay, lovely to read you and thanks for visiting.

Doglover, hi! Haven't read you for a while. Will probably take your advice re throwing away the list.

Hello Pam, I know, those stars just increase my insecurity level.

SITH, guess what?? Today I am adding "stay in all day to wait for windscreen guy" to my list. Grrr.

Calum, I think Clutter was a really mean name to give a child. I'd change it. :0)

Maggie, think you are right. I am always up for a bit of self indulgence, any excuse will do.

Mzungu Chick, now I'm worried if you can't see those stars. Was it all in my imagination?

Hello Travelling, sitting in the shade and writing eh? Yeah, right.

Irene - that's it! Spring tiredness! That's what my trouble is, no doubt about it.

MMOF, trust you to put everything into perspective as always. Ta.

Hi Bart, nice to read you, will be over to see if your list is longer than mine.

Hi Sarah, lovely to read you, thanks for visiting. Dealing with the mundane is OK once it's done, but how I hate doing it.

Aims, those bloody stars just appeared to taunt me I think, but now they're gone I kinda miss them.

GBS, it's SO comforting to know that I am not the only one drowning in trivia.

Hi Expatmum, you are quite right of course - I'm trying to do too many things at once and typically, not doing anything at all in the end.

Hello Journey of Truth - I am so relieved that you've had stars on your blog too, was beginning to think it was all a dream.....

Hi Barb, you had stars too? Phew. Now I want to know why they chose us....spooky.

Mean Mom said...

Hmmm! I understand what you mean about having lots to do. You spend so much time stressing about the things you need to do, that you never do any of them.

I hate having work done in the house. The last time we had workmen in, I noticed that one of them was eyeing up a cake, on the worktop. When I asked him if he would like a piece, with his tea, (you're right, I do spoil my workmen) he answered 'I'm not sure. Is it homemade?' It suited him as a hat. It did, really. It was worth the extra trip to Waitrose.

Mean Mom said...

It's worked! I managed to put your favourite picture in my profile. It's just for you. I hope it made you laugh. I shall have to take it out again, now, as I don't think anyone else would be amused! Hope you've gained at least a few seconds of relaxation!

Exmoorjane said...

Oh yes, this is all horribly familiar. I think not being able to blog has a lot to do with unfinished kitchens myself.
Just think yourself lucky you're not me - not only have I an unfinished kitchen (with six builders/firemen camped permanently in my house) but we can't even think about a holiday because of looking after my aged mother's colitic and incontinent (and also very aged) dog. Life is so unfair it has to be a conspiracy! Great blog btw...really enjoyed it.

Swearing Mother said...

Hi Mean Mom, yes I do love that picture - it never fails to make me laugh. One night I even showed it to my husband who was looking at his laptop whilst in bed (yes, I know, we need to see a counsellor), and he laughed his head off.

Hello Exmoor Jane, lovely to read you. Now you've made me feel really guilty about moaning - a colitic and incontinent dog must top everything as far as stress is concerned.

Frog in the Field said...

Sit down.
I have the vat to do...late!
My accounts.
school bursary stuff...late
post to open, ugh!!
I'm procastination queen matey!

Tina said...

SM, I feel for you. I'm back, have just done a post which could have been titled Procrastination is the haven of damn fool men', but you put it so much better.

You need to make time to blog for us, let the kitchen wait. That's why God invented takeaways.

Swearing Mother said...

Frog, don't like the sound of your list at all.

TINA!! You're back! Will be over ASAP to catch up with the goss.

CrazyCath said...

You scared 'em off SM! I know who to call now in a crisis... ;0)

I have loads of paperwork to do too.... and I am blogging because I am behind in my blogs. So I can be a sad person with you.

Just moan away. We're listening and if it makes you feel better....
I like doglovers comment - throwing away the list sounds good to me.

Swearing Mother said...

Hi Cath, have got quite a few things crossed off the list this weekend but added a few as well. But at least I'm waving, not drowning.

Cait O'Connor said...

Just discovered your blog and very good it is too.
We all have the same problem finding time for what we really want to do don't we?. I blogged recently on the same problem. I have done away with lists and just do what I really want to do each day. Someone hinted that I was putting duties before desires. I am back to going with the flow and all that. How long it will last is another thing :)

Lil Jimmy said...

I'm having a devil of a job making any headway with anything and everything in my life at the moment. I've got a "to-do" list as long as a roll of Andrex loo paper, and absolutely nothing, repeat nothing, is getting crossed off it.

Join the club.

Swearing Mother said...

Hi Cait, lovely to read you. Putting duty before pleasure used to be a major problem of mine, so much in fact that there was hardly any time left for pleasure. Then I saw the light and became a lazy slut. But the lists still haunt me.

Lil Jimmy, glad to be in the same club as you, any day.

Anonymous said...

OI matey - get a grip your a woman you can do it all. Well thats ok then , but youdont have to do it all.
Do something you want to do and be a little crazy
Then list the mundane stuff and get to it eventually
Life is good and fun and dont let the baddies in


Know exactly how you feel - lists, lists and lists of lists. It's always good to start with 'Write list' - then that's at least one you can tick off! Currently in slightly calmer mode, but have been many times exactly where you are. And anything involving builders is a bloody nightmare, let's face it. Particularly empathised with the feeling 'distracted' bit - a sure sign of stress.

And yeah, what about those silly little stars? They appeared briefly on my blog too a few days back and then disappeared again - just the Google geeks tinkering about in an idle moment I guess!

CrazyCath said...

Hi SM - hope you're still waving!

I have another thing to put on your list - you're TAGGED baby! Sorry. Come over mine and see what you have to do...

the mother of this lot said...

You're asking ME how to sort your life out??

Milla said...

am now feeling insecure because I HAVEN'T had the rating star things.

Tina said...

Come on then Sweary, where have you gone?

travelling, but not in love said...

As Betty Boo once 'sang'...

"Where are you baby? We used to have so much fun"

Come back SM, all is forgiven!

Swearing Mother said...

Hi Valleys Mam, took your advice and packed my bags and took off for a few days. You were right!

Hello Her On The Hill, lovely to read you. Yes, those stars are definitely a little worrying, first we had them and then we didn't. What's going on?

Cath, yes still waving! Will be over ASAP.

MOTL, I definitely need help, any advice gratefully received.

Milla, don't get paranoid, I think they were a mirage.

Hi Tina, back now bab.

Travelling, I love it when you sing to me.

A Mother's Place is in the Wrong said...

Hi SM, just catching up after far tooooo long. You've had so much good advice here from the Blogging set, I can only add, do one thing a day - that's the only way I get through when things are overwhelming. M xx
PS Great Blog as always, so don't fret over that!