Sunday, 8 July 2007

I've seen the future and I don't like the look of it.

I am writing this in a state of shock combined with deep depression. Went to a 60th birthday party last night and came back absolutely stone cold sober, both of us, and not just the one who was driving. We didn't dance. There was no music. No one fell over pissed or made an arse of themselves doing a Mick Jagger impersonation to the deafening strains of Brown Sugar. All of the women kept most of their clothes on all of the time (there's a mercy I suppose). People sat around in polite groups nursing the same drink all night (on medication), avoided the buffet (type 2 diabetes) and only went upstairs to pee (for which I suppose we should have been grateful, given the possible alternative). Sigh.

So what the hell is happening? Doesn't everyone know that WE ARE THE BABY BOOMERS, and as such WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO GET OLD? I don't think the message is getting through somehow, despite pictures of the lovely Lulu, fantastic Joanna Lumley and gorgeous Bryan Ferry. Instead of chatting about work, kids, holidays and house prices like we used to, the conversation was of retirement, pensions, downsizing and (horror) ailments.

I may hang myself.

I'm not sure now how to handle this situation. Do I carry on in my own sweet way eating, drinking and being a bit too merry? Is it still OK to continue having fun over fifty with clothes, hair, makeup and music? Or am I in denial? Given the choice between slowly shuffling into the sunset in a comfy pair of Footgloves or falling off my platforms at Hobbs' sale, I know which one I'd choose, given the opportunity. But then, of course, I am nowhere near being 60 yet (yeah, right).


wife in the north said...

Jane, about time. How marvellous. I shall send Mutley straight over.(Do not sign for any packages he sends you.)

jane said...

Thankyou! But can I still come over to play at your house?

I have SO enjoyed your blog and will continue to do so. Am a bit scared of Mutley though, he is such a bad dog!

laurie said...

found you through (of course) witn who still has no idea who i am.

re parties: this is why we don't go anymore. in the old days, you ripped open a bag of chips, stocked some coolers with beer on ice, and cranked the music. nonstop fun. all nonsense.

nowadays: polite. really beautiful food. conversation. white wine. i get bored and shy and tongue tied, even when it's people i know very well.

throw your own party. rip open some chips....see what happens.

jane said...

You are so right Laurie, it can all be so simple really. Thanks for reminding me - ripping open this chips this weekend for sure!

Best wishes.

ginger witch said...

Well, I'm not quite up to the half century but at 41 got married recently. one of my proudest moments from the day was the fact that I 'was the most pissed bride' the taxi driver had ever seen!! So party on. And sang I Will Survive vaguely in tune with our band!!

Swearing Mother said...

I wish I'd been at your wedding reception! I bet your wedding photos are fantastic.

Thanks for visiting!

ginger witch said...

Look a bit hammered on the pics but most are great, thanks mostly to our great photographer (and friend). A fab day hd by all anyway!!

Renie said...

I love this site, i've been giggling my way through it!

As for Ginger witch, she looked and was amazing on her wedding day and there were others in a worse state i can assure you!

i went to a pampered chef party last night at my sisters. She and her friends are ten years my junior and yet none of them drank and all were trying to hard to make polite conversation.
It was sooooo dull! If it hadn't been for the toffee bottom i swear i'd have left early.
I may hold one of these parties myself but it will be a bring a bottle party and the theme will be chocolate! Only fun outrageous people allowed!
See you there Ginger Witch!