Friday 28 December 2007

Food Glorious Food

I am getting stir crazy. I don't want to do battle in the shopping mall but I am definitely thinking of excuses to get out of the house - a walk to the pub or park or a gentle wander down to Waitrose for some fresh salad stuff is on the cards any minute now. My body is screaming out for anything not covered in icing, double cream or gravy, at this point I wouldn't give a stuff if I never saw another mince-pie, and I've just completed my favourite recipe for leftover turkey which involves opening the bin and throwing the bloody thing in it.

We've still got half a baby Stilton, an appallingly odoriferous Brie, two tons of chocolate and a tree with no needles left on it. Oh, and half a sherry log. And a ham. With Nigella Bloody Lawson's spiced peaches, which were very nice actually once I'd got some jars, but right now even the smell of cinnamon is enough to make me gag.

Enough already.

The foods which seemed to be so vital and jostling for pole position on my "must have or your Christmas catering will be rubbish" list are now lying wilted and tired, unopened at the bottom of my decimated fridge, pointing withered fingers at me and laughing mockingly. I am trying not to think about the money I've needlessly spent but cannot stop myself feeling bad about such a terrible waste of food. Remind me next year not to be so silly. Yes I know we should be eating it all up, but frankly I couldn't face another sausage roll to save my life.

Meanwhile, I've got nothing for dinner.

I could kill a curry.

17 comments:

Beachfreak said...

You mean.

You didn't.

Use the turkey.

For stock?

I'm devastated.

Swearing Mother said...

Sadly, no. And I didn't make gravy out of the giblets either.

So there.

The Woman who Can said...

I feel liberated. I'm going to throw the rest of the turkey in the bin. Could I tempt you to a cracker with some cheese though? I'll bring it round?

the rotten correspondent said...

Amen, sister. You took the words right out of my mouth.

We went and had Chinese BBQ last night for a kid's birthday and it was fabulous. Of course it just jump started my world class indigestion and here I sit - waiting to explode.

I'm done. And I'll have to remember that turkey recipe.

Kim said...

I am right there with you. We had cheeseburgers and fries for dinner last night. And it was wonderful!

The Draughtsman said...

Nowt like PLAIN food eh? Enough of 101 ways to do a turkey over the 12 **@&* days of Christmas.

merry weather said...

I binned the turkey too. Beans on toast anyone? Or how about we just miss a meal altogether. I don't think anyone would notice... Sigh, glad to hear you feel the same Jane.

Amy said...

The obsession with food over the holidays gets much, eh?

I'm happy to just have stocking candy all day. But children have to eat, so I let each kid choose one dish, and that's that. This year, we had the highly traditional meal of spinach lasagna and samosas.

Anonymous said...

didnt have a turkey , refused this year,had rib of welsh black beef and a lush leg of pork. left overs were curried yesterday.
Didnt buy lots of posh cheese ,didnt but stollen, didnt buy lots of stuff.No one noticed - and wait for it I did Chips on boxing day -everyone clapped.
Now its bloody new year to battle with

laurie said...

my body CRAVES oranges, anything astringent and fresh and healthy.

but my mouth says, wait! i see chocolate truffles! wait! there's a big bowl of mixed nuts! WAIT!!!

work is still awash in people's leftover christmas goodies. and i am having a hard time walking past any of them.

FjordLine said...

I love that turkey recipe. One year I did the whole hog,and never again. Now I buy turkey crown,so tiny that I get pitying "Poor you on your own for Christmas" looks in supermarket, but with 2 vegetarian daughters and remaining 3 of us only eating a little bit, and not wanting to see turkey beyond midnight c. day, it works for me.
And a big bowl of salad followed by some good chocolates is what i want right now!

DogLover said...

Me - I haven't had any turkey this year and I miss it! Went to my brother's for Christmas and had excellent beef Wellington cooked by my sister in law. And had ham for lunch on Boxing Day at their son's house.

By the way, I'm the guy who commented on one of your comments on Retired & Crazy's blog [12th December, your comment 17th December]. You promised me a good drubbing if I ever visited your weblog - so here I am! Do your worst!

NB. I notice you haven't used any swearwords since then (I don't count "arsed", "give a stuff" and "bloody" as respectable swearwords - I tend to use "bloody" in speech, though I'm trying to stop). Can it be that the ripples from my email to R&D have reached your weblog and had an effect? Perish the thought!

Happy New Year, swearingmother -

doglover

Swearing Mother said...

Hi Tina, go for it girl, cold turkey never did anyone any good in the long term. Thanks for the offer of cheese etc., would have taken you up on it if we hadn't got our own European cheese mountain to get through here. Thanks anyway!

RC: Now you've made me want a Chinese, indigestion and all. Am fantasising about duck salad at this very moment!

Kaycie, I haven't had a cheeseburger in years, now I want one. It's all your fault.

Norman, you are so right. I don't really like turkey to begin with, I only cook it to be sociable. So I am glad it's all gone now.

Hi Merry: We had beans on toast last night because I just couldn't take any more. Lovely.

Amy what a good idea, we love spinach in this house, so I am making a veggie lasagne tonight with some in it.

Valleys Mam, did you say the "chip" word? Now those are a real treat, especially home made.

Laurie, I am identifying with you like mad, I cannot stop eating. Been shopping today and had lunch at a local department store, but I don't know why when we've got so much at home.

Mike, it's a psychological thing, something to do with excess and feasting and all that stuff. Every year I say I won't over cater, and every year I do it again, so you are very wise.

Swearing Mother said...

Hello Doglover: Sorry to disappoint but I'm afraid I only saw Retired and Crazy's entertaining post regarding my swearing and your comments about it last night as I've been too busy to catch up until then, so nothing you said to her has had any effect on my blog. Or would it.

The lovely thing about blogging is that one is free, within reason, to say what one likes, in any way one chooses to express oneself. No "Mary Whitehouse" functionality is required because the individual reader can decide for themselves whether or not a blog causes them offence, and if it does they won't read any further or come back again. No criticism of individual bloggers, their language, grammar, content or style is necessary because if we are irritated by what we read, we can stop. It's a choice thing. If we inadvertently stumble across something which we find distasteful, salvation is merely a click away.

You still there?

I choose to swear, or not, as the case may be and as the mood takes me. Mine is not an ugly, malicious type of swearing, or merely a habit of speech. It's something which hopefully the people who frequently visit here take for what it is, a bit of fun and no big deal.

So, if I don't see you again Doglover, have a fucking great New Year, and thanks for visiting.

DogLover said...

Got it wrong, didn't I, swearingmother! Thought your comment was dated 17th December, but I see it was 28th December, as you say [confusing way the blog dates comments].

I like your analysis of swearing! I still think it's unnecessary, but each to his or her own...

You'll be slightly anxious to hear that I have bookmarked your weblog!

Thanks for the good wishes.

doglover

Swearing Mother said...

Welcome back Doglover, we can agree to differ re swearing, but don't expect me to take any prisoners.

It ain't my style.

Best wishes for New Year, will be looking out for you!

:o)

Swearing Mother said...
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